It used to be that the whole idea of technical support was to make sure your customers were happy with your product and service so that they would remain your customer.
These days, technical support is usually 'augmented' (or entirely replaced) with internet FAQs.
In theory, this all makes a lot of sense. In practice, the customer is the loser.
I have come to the conclusion that most companies have a 'bag-lady' mentality. You've seen bag-ladies on the street. They either carry large bags or have a shopping cart full of their possessions so that they can keep an eye on every single thing. They even sleep with the stuff. This is the mentality of most senior management in Corporate America. They will tell you to your face that Quality and Customer Service is important. But only if they don't have to spend any money on it. Most Quality and Lean Programs fail just for that reason. Senior management will not commit to the dollars required.
This also results in the reduction of support personnel, cheap hires and information-free websites, that is, websites free from any kind of information. Forums were originally created so that users could modify their equipment and use it in non-standard ways, or for the makers of free stuff (applications, programs, operating systems, etc) could provide a level of technical support.
Senior management, of course, viewed technical support websites and forums and salivated. Think Cheap, Cheap, Cheap. And, for the most part, that's what they got. They got technical support personnel that know less about their products than the customers, so they provided 'expert' systems. They never realized that expert systems need to be used by people who know how to search. So they put FAQs on a website. Of course the FAQs only covered the barest minimum of problems, usually identical to the half page of troubleshooting at the back of the manual. "Unit does not turn on" Solution: "Plug unit into AC outlet."
In the past, I was able to rely on Cox Communications for excellent customer service. However, somewhere along the line, things deteriorated. Below is the story of how I got a very simple question answered. Management should be ashamed.
How to annoy your customers – HDTV version
Our lone HDTV set is in the basement so that we can watch while on the treadmill. The problem is that sometimes you have to really crank up the volume to hear the audio while running on the treadmill. So I decided to find out how to turn on the Closed Captioning.
This should be simple. So I thought.
Any HDTV system is not simple. In my case, I have to turn on 3 items: The TV, the cable box and the audio system. That plus I have two DVD/VHS players, so there are five remotes sitting around. And, no matter what the cable company tells you, they don’t give you a ‘universal’ remote. They give you a remote that will control some of the options of each device. For example, the universal cable remote will not be able to access the TV’s input switching. You’ll need to use the TV remote for that.
Well, for closed captioning, that’s what I did, reached for the TV remote. It had a nice CCD button. This was real easy. So I thought. The TV gave me a nice ‘denied’ icon and in the menu, Closed Captioning was grayed out.
So I went to the TV manual. There was plenty on how to turn CCD on and change the options, but no word on what is happening when the option doesn’t seem to work.
I got on the internet to find out what was wrong with my brand of TV. I had bought an Insignia. The price was right and I have no complaints on the picture. However, in this case, their ‘FAQs’ were useless. I went to the forum and thank God, I did not have to register or else this episode of ‘Customer Support Follies’ would still be longer. At the forum, I discovered that, if I had a cable box, the CCD was through the cable box, not the TV.
Then this should be easy, thought I as I grabbed the ‘universal’ cable remote. So I thought.
After spending about 10 minutes fooling with the remote, which did not have a CCD button, I was no closer to getting CCD. So now I go off and try to find another manual. The only manual, or rather piece of shiny plasticized paper, that comes with the cable box is how to hook it up. In English and Spanish. The remote has a manual. However there is not one word on CCD.
Back to the internet.
My cable company, Cox, is very fond of telling you over and over again that you can access their website and get answers to your questions. I’ve heard that thousands of times while on hold with their tech support. Still, I try the website first.
I started out by searching under ‘How to’. I got 84 results. The first result which had a 53% relevance (the next were all in the single digits), was the basic instructions on how to connect your box to the TV. It had neither the word ‘closed’ nor the word ‘caption’ in it. So much for relevance.
I switch to searching from the 'How-to's' to ‘All’. I got the same exact results.
If you’ve been keeping track, I have wasted about 20 minutes so far.
With the website obviously useless, I dial technical support. I don’t ever do this lightly because you have to fight your way through the voice response system before you can get to real person you can actually ask questions.
First I had to ignore the prompt for Spanish. Then I had to punch a number to tell them I had an account. Then I had to punch in my 10 digit phone number. Since I have two accounts, I now had to punch in the 16 digit account number. Then I’m asked for the last 4 digits of my social security number or the four digit PIN. Now finally they ask me if I have questions on my bill, want new service, etc, until I get to punch in the number for tech support, which obviously should be the last possible selection. Now I have to punch a number to tell them it’s tech support for TV. Luckily this one is the first selection. This gets me into the next voice response system – tech support! After hearing that channel 9 is having technical difficulties, listening to how resetting my cable cox can solve almost all of my problems, I hit the number so that they won’t reset my cable box.
I’ve now been on the phone ten minutes and am still fighting my way through the menu system. But I’m stubborn. Of course I’ve convinced that the first live person I’m connected to, will know nothing, but I glory in the struggle!
Now the voice response system asks me to ‘say’ what my problem is. I tell it ‘I want to turn on closed captioning.’ There is a long pause. Similar to the long pause you get from customer support people when they realize that you actually want them to help you. Isn’t it amazing how close to reality the voice response system is getting?
The system, now confused that I don’t want a canned response, responds with a list of problems it understands. The last option (of course it’s the last one) is ‘I have another problem’. This finally prompts the system to say it will transfer me to an ‘agent’.
I’m now up to almost 15 minutes and not quite there yet.
I have to listen again as to how my problem could have easily been solved by going to the website then finally I get an agent. His speech is slow and his tone is lazy. I have a bad feeling about this.
But wait, we’re not home free yet! For security purposes I have to:
1 – Give him my ten digit telephone number.
2 – Since I have two accounts, I have to give him the 16 digit account number.
3 – Now I have to verify my first and last name.
4 – I have to verify my address.
5 – I have to give him the last four digits of my social security number or the four digit pin.
Sorry about the delay, he says.
Now we are at the 20 minute mark and I finally get to ask my question. But, as anyone knows, I’m just beginning the struggle.
“How do I turn on closed captioning?” I ask. Just what I expect now happens. He tells me he’s happy to tell me that if I hold on for a moment. In other words, He has no clue and needs to ask somebody.
After a short time, he comes back and tells me all I have to do is hit the ‘settings’ button on the remote. Been there done that. When I tell him all I get is instructions on how to use the Info button, he argues with me. He keeps asking me if I have the Cox remote. Is it the silver Cox remote?
“Yeah it’s the Cox remote, it has ‘COX’ at the bottom in blue letters!” I respond.
“I’m watching television right now and I get closed captioning by pressing the settings button,” he says.
Sorry buddy, but I wasn’t born yesterday. I read him off exactly what is on the screen and tell him it’s an HD box, it must be different.
So I’m on hold again. While on hold, I play with the control again and find out I can access the Closed Caption Option by hitting the Menu button twice. I don’t ask me why I tried that, except that talking to tech support makes you really desperate.
He comes back on the line to tell me what I just found out but I blurt it out first. I do that because although I can access the Closed Captioning, I can’t turn it on and make it stick, it keeps switching back to off.
He makes a series of nonsensical noises that was supposed to pass for help. One thing is obvious, he has no idea what I’m seeing or doing. I narrate what I’m doing as he again departs to ask for help. Do you see the pattern here?
When he gets back, I’ve figured it out. Apparently you can’t just turn on the Closed Captioning and exit the menu. You have to go back two levels, then exit. This is the true definition of user-unfriendly. Now, of course, I have another problem. The captions are now in the center of the screen. I ask about this and again, I’m on hold and he’s off asking for help.
I change a few channels and find out that the position of the captions varies from channel to channel and sometimes scene to scene.
The ‘tech support’ person comes back on and tells me the first relevant piece of information I’ve heard from him. Apparently the close captioning is done by a third party and Cox has no control over the position. He tells me to change channels and see what happens. Been there, done that. I had really seriously considered hanging up on him before he came back. I was nice, however, and thanked him for his help and got off the line.
Total time: Over an hour. Just to find out how to turn on CCD. And I virtually did it all myself. I had had the wild thought that calling tech support would be a shortcut.
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